Well my mental note to self worked as I've just spent the best part of 2hrs attempting to design my website.........it's cringe worthy and in desperate need of help (MUM's the word as she's quite creative so I'll get her to help sometime over the weekend). The weekend is gonna be good as the whole family will be here on sunday for lunch (sister's birthday) but it'll emphasize the fact I'm on my own. My brother and sister have been with their respective partners for years, me, on my own mostly until I met him, the man of my dreams who has turned out to be not who I thought he was. Been thinking about him a lot today, hence the title, tried to ring him earlier but there was no answer so I left a message.... STUPID STUPID STUPID!!!! Why is it that the one you love the most hurt you the most. Having a down day today, just keep reminding myself about my new job to try and cheer myself up but its not working out well, awaiting start date after my CRB check clears and that maybe its best we're not together anymore, couldn't of coped with his mother, she was so rude. Went round there last boxing day and she ignored me! We both arrived for lunch, bearing gifts and all jolly, his sister was a total spoilt brat and his mother completely blanked me. Feel better for that little rant as I was beginning to get all depressed and feel sorry for myself. Need some beauty sleep now, very exciting day tomorrow.......NOT. Off down the job centre to sign on!